Nessie the Loch Ness Monster is real and so is this Burlington based baseball team. Some will make you hungry, others will just confuse the hell out of you. The lettering design looks like something someone who mastered MS Paint in the early 2000s would be proud of and I’m here for it. The font is delicious. Unfortunately, this team name is not a nod to conspiracy theorists everywhere. Corn subsidy policy aside, that’s one mean looking stalk who looks more than ready to belt some balls into the stratosphere. The font is right in line with spooky season, the spider is equally cute and scary, and the little webs on the letters and in the back ground is just adorable. Pedro Guerrero (Northern League) flew to all his games while the rest of the team took the bus. Extra points for the absurd name and the classic baseball font in the spelling of “Nuts.” The Modesto font is weird and looks more like a brand of pasta or espresso, but you can’t win them all. That smile says “Yeah, I was with your girlfriend last night, what are you gonna do about it?” and the lettering looks like it would be in a Crimson Chin comic book if such thing existed. So this means the narwhal is living one of two possible realities. Where this overall concept loses points for its lack of absurdity, it makes up for in a big way with its insane cuteness. Walla Walla, WA for those who don’t know is notorious for growing sweet onions enjoyed all over. Enough with the history, the chicken looks like the “Cluckin’ Bell” chicken from the fast food chain featured in the Grand Theft Auto video game series. Atlanta Braves reliever Kerry Lightenberg contract was purchased from the Minneapolis Loons (Prairie League) for 6 dozen bats and two dozen baseballs. I feel like I’m getting a hand written invitation to a 10 year old’s bowling birthday bash. There’s an old joke that many baseball statistics are invented and calculated because people watching are too bored to not solve such algorithms. Any little league dad looking to teach their catcher kid how to increase his Pop Time (POP) can point to this grasshopper on what he should look like making a pick-off throw. Instead of recognizing that his situation is a reflection of a hard line shift to a knowledge based service economy, global competition, and vast increases in the effectiveness of automation, he blames immigrants for his problems. All MLB, team and league logos are © Major League Baseball and/or the respective teams or leagues. I mean c’mon, googly eyes, a butter tongue, and gloves that a Mario character would wear. This is the worst logo in minor league sports and it’s not even close. Finally, because Jacksonville, specifically Mayport is known for its shrimp, this a perfect name for the team. What I like about this logo is that the graphic designer tried to make it intimidating even though the name is as absurd as “Rumble Ponies.” Such a metal font and color scheme juxtaposed with such a light and mystical team name. This truly is the team for middle aged women who recently moved to Arizona and became obsessed with yoga and frogs. Further, it looks to be hitting piss missiles with a bat that has the girth of a wiffle ball bat. Leave it to bourgeois Hartford to add 18th century-ass squiggles to the “Y” and “G” letters in Yard Goats. Also, having been to the stadium, their “Welcome to the Squirrely Gates” sign by the gates is a nice touch. It may be getting warmer, but it’s not officially spring until…The Masters, I mean Augusta Green Jacket baseball. Good vibes only. All around, this is a hit, go Lake Monsters! In the list below I will reveal my top 35 favorite minor league baseball teams as well as the worst design concept I’ve ever seen. Feeling consistently inferior to North Carolina and being the state that started and lost a bloody civil war fought for immoral reasons must be difficult. The ‘“Kokomo” lettering fills the classic baseball font requirement while “Jackrabbits” looks like it just came out of the basement of ‘That 70s Show’ stoned out of its mind. Leave it to the friendly town of Asheville to welcome an already abundant number of tourists by naming their ball club in their honor. Only Texas is more obsessed with their own flag. The cursive Grasshoppers underlined by the city name basically just told me that instant replay is ruining the integrity of the game and Fernando Tatis Jr. shouldn’t be swinging at a 3–0 pitch in a blowout ball game in the 8th. It is unique for a club to be named after something not feared, but actively hated by just about everyone and have it come out cool. Ruben Davila (Texas - LA League) while out on bond for conspiracy to transport 350 pounds of Marijuana pitched for Corpus Christi (0-0, 6.75 ERA). Incorporating the state flag Palmetto tree/Moon combination is clever for this team, but par for the course for South Carolina. As much as I can see hyper “I love my truck/chivalry ain’t dead/I aint no sexist” masculine southern men of all ages refusing to wear Trash Panda gear because “that’s just stupid, man” I can also see plenty of folks embrace this hilarious team.